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Ole Geezer goes shoppin’

March 27th, 2007

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It was on a February winter morning. It had snowed three or four inches the night before. Out doors, everything was covered with a coat of pure white snow.

The Geezeress was in the process of baking four (count ‘em…. four!) pies for oldest grandson, Ryan’s 16th birthday party. Two apple and two cherry pies. All of a sudden, she hollered, “Oh no! I’m out of cherries for the cherry pies! Oh well …. I guess I’ll have to drop everything and go to town to fetch a couple cans of pie cherries… Oh Oh and I just noticed I don’t have quite enough flour.”

The Ole Geezer had just finished his breakfast of a bowl of oatmeal, a bowl of stewed prunes and his “once in a while” cup of weak coffee (heavy on the whitener) and was thinkin’ about going out and shovelin’ snow off the driveway, pathways and patio. A brilliant idea popped into his head, “I could do what my best talent is ……… PROCRASTINATE. I could procrastinate shovelin’ snow by volunteerin’ ta go ta town.”

So he did. He said, “Would ya like me ta go ta town an’ fetch that there stuff ya need fer makin’ them pies?

The Geezeress says, “Oh would you, Sweetheart. That would give me time to peel apples, etc. etc.”

The Ole Geezer, pleased as punch to be procrastinatin’ the snow shovelin’ chore grabbed the “grocery store shoppin’ list” quicker’n a hog can snarf up a bucket ‘a slop, jumped in the SUV and headed on down the road. He hadn’t gotten a half mile from home when he suddenly looked all around him. The beauty God had created the night before was an awesome sight. The deciduous now leafless trees covered with snow looked like they had been spray gun painted with a heavy coating of white vanilla frosting. The pine trees seemed to be extra green under their covering of brilliant white snow which also looked sparkling white vanilla frosting. The yards and fields along the way were covered with an unblemished blanket of virgin white snow, as yet untouched by neither domestic nor wild animal nor human tracks or foot prints. It was as beautiful ‘a winter landscape portrait as ya could ever imagine, bar none. Probably ’cause God, his self, is who done the creatin’ of it.

When the Ole Geezer arrived at the mini mall where the grocery store is located, he was surprised that there were hardly any cars in the parking lot.
He went in the grocery store, got himself a basket shoppin’ cart and was ‘a walking down the main isle, when this lady clerk approaches him an’ says, “Good morning, sir ………… Can I help you find anything?” That lady clerk was soooo friendly …… it was like honey spillin’ out’a tipped over honey jar. He told her he needed some cans ‘a pie cherries.

She says, “You go down isle such and such and ….. better yet, just follow me and I’ll take you right to them.” When they got ta the pie cherry, etc. section she asked if she could help him find anything else and went through the whole process again. When the Ole Geezer finally gets ta the check out counter, those clerks was a’ drippin’ with the same amount ‘a spelt honey. It was if all these people thought Jesus was a’ coming tomorrow an’ they was ‘a tryin’ ta get in as many good licks a’ good deeds as possible before He gets here. But it was great. What a way ta start the day. It made the Ole Geezer’s short day ‘a shoppin’ a real pleasurable experience.

On his drive back home, the Ole Geezer had the privilege of seeing, again, the breath taking, beautiful winter wonderland painting God had created the night before. ‘A course in another hour or so, the weather warmed up and the picture changed. It was not quite as beautiful out side, but the great feeling inside of the Ole Geezer remained for a good part of that day. What a wonderful world this would be if all mankind had the same attitude all the time as the clerks in that store did for a short time. I’m sure as the day got busier, the spilled honey jar disappeared, but it was nice while it lasted.

Hope as your day, today continues, you encounter some spelt honey jars.

Papa (Jim Diede)

This entry was posted on Tuesday, March 27th, 2007 at 2:26 pm and is filed under Upper Grant Creek. Edit this entry.

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Ole Geezer goes shoppin’

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